Deve Gowda...The "honorable" former PM of India...

I don't know how to begin, & where to begin from...Nevertheless, let me make an effort at least.

Our "esteemed, distinguished, honorable, respected" former PM, Deve Gowda, hitherto known for causing trouble to existing Governments, and for ruining the lives of his mentors and followers, has acquired one more feather for his already highly decorated crown. Here are some of his accomplishments in his "distinguished" career.

1. Joined active politics & was the right hand man of Ramakrishna Hegde (his political mentor & former Karnataka CM) for quite a long time. During that period, he earned the trust of Hegde, which eventually proved costly for Hegde.
2. Dumped Ramakrishna Hegde. After that dump, Hegde could not make a political comeback like he did earlier in his career.
3. Held various portfolios as cabinet minister in different Governments. He was also briefly the CM of Karnataka between 1994 & 96, before becoming the PM.
4. Won a few Loksabha elections from Uttarahalli (once, the largest Loksabha constituency in the country) & Hassan constituencies, which can perhaps be regarded backward, although represented by a former PM.
5. In between, he became the PM of the country, which coincidentally is the highest democratic office in this country. His election to become the PM itself was woven with umpteen dramas & compromises. Eventually, Gowda emerged as the "consensus candidate" of the United Front Government, & held on to his "kursi" for roughly 11 months.
6. Was caught sleeping in various public platforms by media while he was the PM. Upon being questioned by the media if his role as PM had deprived him of good sleep, his standard response was,"I am not sleeping. I am immersed in deep thought about the country's future".
7. Was defeated from the Uttarahalli constituency in the 2004 Loksabha elections by a first timer, Ms. Tejaswini Sriramesh (who was a former firebrand journalist with a popular news channel).
8. Dumped Siddaramaiah, the former Deputy CM of Karnataka, & a trusted Deve Gowda follower. Siddu (as he is popularly called) was dumped in order to protect & promote the political future of his son, H D Kumaraswamy.
9. Colluded with Congress to form a coalation Government in Karnataka. While the Congress was the ruling partner with Dharam Singh as the CM, Deve Gowda never let him sleep peacefully. Every other day he used to meet the hapless Dharam Singh or dash off a letter or hold press meetings demanding something or the other. Poor man, Dharam Singh must have had the worst time of his entire public life while he was the CM. So much so that, he might even be considering his defeat in the 2009 Loksabha election better than his tenure as CM. Subsequently, Deve Gowda enacted a drama & made his son, H D Kumaraswamy pull out of the coalation & form a Government with the support of the BJP. Even as Kumaraswamy was taking oath as the CM, Deve Gowda was enacting a drama "disowning" his son's betrayal of his trust of backing the Dharam Singh led Government. After Kumaraswamy was in power for about 18 months, once again Deve Gowda was back to his old tactics. He made his son pull the rug right under BJP's feet and ruined Yediyurappa's chances of becoming the CM. After pulling the rug, Deve Gowda was once again negotiating with Congress to form the Government with his son as the CM. That did not fructify, & elections were held. Rest all is history.

It is said, Deve Gowda cannot stay without being in power for too long. Somehow, by hook or crook, directly or indirectly, he likes to stay in power. Now, when the incumbent BJP Government is trying to execute Supreme Court order of completing the long pending BMIC project, he stages protest in support of the "aggrieved" farmers who have lost land to the "land grabbing" BMIC project. And, what does the "leader of aggrieved farmers" do? He calls the democratically elected head of Karnataka a "bas***d" & "son of bi***". As if to top it all, he says he regrets and withdraws his words if it had hurt the CM. I have only this response to Deve Gowda,"Mr. ex-PM, your regret & withdrawing of the statement does not in any way show you up in high esteem. In fact, I'm happy you have come out in your true colors after more than 50 years in public life. And, I, as a citizen of this wonderful country feel ashamed and deeply hurt that upon your death, the National flag will be placed upon your mortal remains, before giving you a 21 gun salute". To make matters better or worse, his beloved son, the former CM of Karnataka defends his father's legacy saying,"my father was aggrieved by the sufferings of the farmers. In a fit of anger, he used those words." All I can say to the father-son duo is,"we now know your character. Thanks for coming out in the open".

To say the least, this incident is nothing short of bringing immense respect, laurel, & decorum to the Office of the Prime Minister of India, which fortunately or unfortunately is the largest democracy in the world. Even as the rest of the world looks at us in wonder on how we have been able to successfully carry on the mammoth exercise of the 5 yearly electoral juggernaut both at the Center & the States for the past 62 years without any coffee or snack break, "leaders" like Deve Gowda elevate such efforts of the wonderful democratic institutions & their associated offices, to the next level, with their effortless use of vulgar language. In my opinion, use of words which are generally regarded as "bad, foul, or vulgar language" by the educated & cultured, is not just unparliamentary, but, it also speaks volumes about the person's character & state of mind. I feel that those occupying or who have occupied high offices in the public domain have to be extremely cautious of the language they use in public. In fact, it is my opinion that only characterless people use such language.

As I was discussing this matter with my friends, some interesting anologies flew past. Here are some of them.

Friend 1: This is what happens when a person not even fit for grazing pigs is made to sit on a throne. He will never be able to appreciate the difference between a gutter filled with filth & a throne made of gold & studded with the most precious stones in the world...

Friend 2: We should send Deve Gowda on exile for the remaining part of his life thanking him profusely for all his "public services". The only problem is in finding an honorable place for him to live. Perhaps, such a place might not exist on earth...So, we should deport him out of earth...

Friend 3: I still wonder how he became PM once upon a time. As they say, if the time is his, even a monkey can rule the world...

Friend 4: I have no more doubts in my mind, he is not a member of the human species. Having said that, I'm not sure if he can belong to any other species in this world...He is perhaps, a unique species by himself...

Friend 5: "I think we should consult an astrologer about what it is that he did in his previous life to become PM". To this I replied,"dude, forget what he was in his past birth...Think what benevolence he can possibly unleash if he returns as the PM of India in his next birth as well".

Friend 6: I think he should be disqualified from holding any public office or participating in the democratic process. In fact, he should be disqualified from even his voting rights...

Friend 7: Who on earth ever pleaded with you to expect any better behavior, that too from Deve Gowda? You set wrong expectations for yourself...Now, stop crying, & enjoy life...It's a good input to tomorrow's "you said it"...

Friend 8: I'm convinced, any damn person in this world can occupy the PMO, when it has been previously honored with Deve Gowda...

Friend 9: I think, Lalu should become the next PM...For one, he's not as "decent, dignified, & cultured" like Deve Gowda...Nobody can beat that benchmark...But, for sure, he has an excellent sense of humor...At least he'll keep people laughing & happy for 5 years...

My last words before I sign off..."Mr. ex-PM, I must say, you have to be given due credit despite the use of characterless words in public, that too, against a CM. For, unlike your other colleagues in politics, you did not resort to the usual 'misquoted by media' tactics. You at least admitted you said those words. To that extent, I think you may be forgiven. And, please accept my deep gratitude for coming out in the open in your true colors. Although it has taken more than 50 years for you to come out in the open, it is at least 'better late than never'. From now on, for the remaining years of your 'public life', you could at least work on your language, without rueing about the words you've already uttered. The people of India could forgive you as a person...but, what image did you leave on the psyche of Indians about the Office of the PM of India? In your own language, any bas***d, bit**, or son of bi*** could occupy the highest democratic office of this country".